They Don'kt Know Me.....
by next2bat99
Summary: My take on the past and present life of Carlos...
1. They don't know me...

Disclaimer: they're not mine, I don't own them, and probably never will...probably  
  
*A few notes  
  
-this is my first fic, so please please please be nice to me.  
  
-A * means Carlos's thoughts  
  
-A ~ means a flashback  
  
  
  
1 They Don't Know Me.  
  
They don't know me. They don't even try to or want to. The only one who ever showed the slightest interest in the "real" me was Doc, and his, like everyone else's, was only a fleeting one. Maybe everyone is right; maybe I am nothing but an uncaring, insensitive bastard.  
  
"Yo, Carlos! Any one home, man?"  
  
"Wha-" He came out of his daze with a start. "Sorry."  
  
"What's with you today?"  
  
"What isn't?" he muttered.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Nothin, nevermind."  
  
It was another typical day for Carlos and Doc with a few drunks, a car accident, and a couple domestic abuses cases. Those were the worst for Carlos. They tended to bring back the memories that he tried so hard to forget. Some of the really bad ones caused him to have nightmares for weeks. Finally, they're shift was over, and they were on their way back to the fire house.  
  
Just then a call came over the radio. Neighbors heard shouts and screams, then nothing, so they called the police. Sully and Davis were already there, and even though they were already off, they were the closest bus so therefore had to go.  
  
"It's pretty bad up there." Davis said as he came out the door. "Two kids, about six and seven. The little one is in the car, he's mostly scared, but the older one is still in there. The mother was beating the younger kid for messin up his piano lessons or something, and when the older one tried to stop here, she just snapped. "  
  
Without a word, Doc and Carlos hurried towards the door. This wasn't usually the kind of house they got these kinds of calls from. It looked pretty expensive. The inside was even more extravagant. A polished and dusr free grand piano stood in the parlor. Just behind it lay the body of a young boy.  
  
~"Carlos! Help me! Momma's gone crazy!!!"  
  
These cries came form a small girl, no older than five. She was on the floor, and had just received a kick in thhe ribs by a woman standing over her. Suddenly, the woman's eyes fell on him, acknowledging his prescence.  
  
"Stay out of this boy! You'll get your's when I'm through with this!"  
  
She raised her foot again, prepared to deliver another blow to the young girl when eight year old Carlos dove at her from behind.  
  
"Leave Alex alone! She didn't do anything!! Get away from her!"  
  
He knew he would pay dearly for his actions, but he couldn't let Alex get any more hurt htan she already was. She was so much smaller and weaker then he. Even if he couldn't totally protect her, he could draw Thei "Momma's" attention long enough for her to get away, maybe even to get help. With that thought, he felt a hand around the back of his neck. Suddenly the wall was rushing towards him. He would have liked to sink into the black oblivion that threatened to enveloped him, but out of the corner of his eye, he could see Alex, still struggling to get up. If he could keep "Momma" busy for a little longer, she could get out. So, with the wall behind him fo rsupport, he stood and faced the woman again, looking directly into her bloodshot eyes. She lowered her face to his and he could smell the alcohol on her breath.  
  
"You just never learn! Well, I'll make sure you learn it this time!"  
  
She raises her hand shakily and hit him hard across the face. It sung, but he stood his ground. Alex was almost at the door. Then, without warning, "momma" grabbed her bottle off the table and broke it over Carlos' head. He couldn't stand his ground any longer. With tears in his eyes, he sank to the flood and into unconsinus.  
  
He awoke later in a hospital bed. A kindly looking doctor smiled down on him.  
  
"I guess that will teach you to fight with your sister, eh?"  
  
"Huh?" Carlos had been through this before. Even in his groggy state, he knew that if he played dumd, pretended he couldn't remember, the doctor would fill in the details for him. At least, Momma's version of the details.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Well," the doctor began, looking slightly concerened, "your mom told me you were fighting with your little sister and you guys fell down the stairs. Do you remember any of this?"  
  
I remember fighting with Alex, but that's it. Is she ok?"  
  
"Oh, yes, a few bumps and bruises, but otherwise unscathed."  
  
A look of relief flooded over the boy's face as he slipped back into darkness.*  
  
"Hey, Nieto, a little help please." 


	2. I don't have a sister anymore...

Ok, this chapter really isn't very well written, but the stuff in it pertains to future chapters, so I decided to just post it already. (  
  
*Don't own them, yada yada yada, you get the point.  
  
  
  
The boy was going to be ok. Physically, anyway. As they brought him in, watching the doctors desperately save the boys life, Carlos couldn't help but remember.  
  
*"You stupid, stupid boy! Don't you ever learn!" Carlos had been running through the house and broke a vase. It wasn't her favorite or anything, all that mattered was that he broke it. He knew what was coming now. With a kind of control beyond most adults, never mind a six-year-old child, Carlos allowed the blows to come, not even trying to defend himself. He had quickly learned that if he pretended to give in, make her think she had won, it would be over sooner. Dealing with this kind of regular abuse also taught him to distance himself, as so not to feel the pain. Oh, it would come later, and he would be in agony, but by distancing himself form it now, he was able to seemingly give in without a fight. Anyone, even a small child, would fight back when hit, but if he didn't feel it, he had no instinct to fight back.*  
  
Sully and Davis found the boys' mother only a few blocks away perched atop a barstool. She was so drunk, she couldn't even stand unaided. With the mother in jail, the younger boy in the custody of the state, and the elder in the ICU, Carlos let out a sigh of relief. Finally, the shift was over, and they were back at the firehouse.  
  
'Hey Carlos!" Kim yelled as he trudged n the door behind Doc, "You got a phone call."  
  
Bewildered as to who or why anyone would be calling him at all, never mind at work, he replied, "Take a message, I have to clean out the bus."  
  
She reappeared a minute later. "She says it's really important."  
  
"Who is it?"  
  
"Do I look like your secretary?" she snapped back, but then regretted it when she says the dull and lifeless looking his eyes. That last call had hit him pretty hard, and he, just like everyone else, just wanted to go home. "Hang on."  
  
While waiting for her, Carlos busied himself pouring a mug of coffee. Just as he finished adding the cream and sugar, Kim reappeared again.  
  
"She says she's your sister."  
  
The mug he was holding crashed to the floor.  
  
~My sister?! No way. That's impossible. I don't have a sister anymore. It can't be her. It's probably just some ex, looking to get back at him or something. Yeah, that must be it. Cause I don't have a sister.~  
  
"Carlos? You ok?" Suddenly he realized everyone was staring at him. Doc had a hand on his shoulder, while Kim looked worriedly at him form across the room.  
  
"Tell whoever it is that they are not funny. I don't have a sister." With that, he stormed out of the room, muttering something about cleaning the bus. Kim looked at Doc, unsure of what to do.  
  
"I..I guess I'll talk to him." Doc said, stepping over the broken mug and falling his partner. When he got downstairs, what he saw was truly shocking.  
  
Carlos-the tough, smart-mouth, inconsiderate, general pain in the ass-was sitting in the back of the ambulance, tears streaming uncontended form under his closed eyelids. 


	3. Who is he?

Ok, I know that this chapter is really, really short, but I couldn't really put it together with the next one. It is just kind of a reflection. You'll get what I mean after you read it. And because it is so short, I am posting chapter 4 at the same time! (  
  
  
  
Doc didn't know what to do. Had it been someone, anyone else sitting before him he could have dealt with it. Even Bosco showed his human side every so often. The only outbursts of emotion he'd ever seen Carlos show were that of anger or annoyance. What did he even know about his young partner? The only mention of his past was that he grew up in foster care and was moved around a lot. As far as Doc knew, Carlos didn't have and family or even any friends outside work. The only thing He knew was that he was studying to become a doctor. Did anyone know the real Carlos? 


	4. Nothing left to break...

Ok, so this chapter is short too, but it gets more into the story, and it was, as promised, posted at the same time as 3.  
  
  
  
If Carlos heard Doc follow him, he made no acknowledgement of his presence. His mind was on another time completely.  
  
*A young boy, maybe eight or nine years old, waved sadly from the curb as a car was pulling away. Pressed against the back window was the tear-stained face of his little sister. He had fought so hard to stay together, and in the end it was no use.  
  
"Carlos, honey, why don't you come inside now?"  
  
He flinched instinctively as a gentle hand was placed on his shoulder. The car carrying his sister had long since faded into the distance. He was always strong; he had to be. Boys didn't cry, and he knew that. He had remained strong through everything, if only to assure his sister that everything would be ok. But he had failed her. He couldn't protect her anymore. Now that she was gone, he could hold it in no longer. His small body racked with sobs as hot tears streamed down his face. *  
  
A broken-hearted but determined young Carlos promised himself that night that he wouldn't let anyone else in. He wouldn't trust anyone. He hadn't shed a single tear since that night. Though having been moved through many homes, even if the were only foster homes, would have broken any one else, Carlos remained strong. There was nothing left inside of him to break. 


End file.
